the vulnerability hangover

It’s been two years since the last message from me…
I’ve been quietly in the background, holding space, tending to the baby that is the Centred Soul app.

A part of me thought there was something wrong with me in not talking about it….. I now know I needed space — to figure out how to speak about something sacred without shouting. 

Since the launch of the app Ive been asked to do interviews, schedule of posts, get my face seen, to talk about the app – but after 6 months I pulled away not knowing why but quietly trusted my inner guidance.

Its not been an easy ride – I’ve felt inner pressure, conditioning:
“ I should be out there promoting this!”

Going pretty much quiet felt counter intuitive to my mind, but not my heart and now looking back on what I’ve shared over that time I can see if it came from a deep place or a place of “I should be doing this…”

So what happened in my inner landscape in those two years? They were about reframing the vocabulary that just doesn’t belong to the heart of Centred Soul —from the inside out. I needed to understand at a heart level that words and actions like marketing, promoting and strategy just didn’t sit right, didn’t fit, with what centred soul is. 

So I’ve sat with those words understand what they mean when living from a deeper level, let them soften and will share reflections from that in the future.

I’ve needed to notice and drown out the rivers of noise of what’s expected, how algorithms work, and how my worth and how the app is assessed. Its work at a root level – its unseen, unlit, feeling my way through and is the deepening of foundations. 

Ive learned to just sit with the baby — to bond, to listen, to be. From this inner space I can now begin to reframe the outside and it feels exciting to do so. 

Recently, CanvasRebel invited me to do an interview and for some reason I felt called to respond – felt ripe. 

What came out from that process was more like a soul offering than a business feature.  And it helped me understand the journey I’ve been on… and what Centred Soul truly is. Im learning to find my feet in expressing it and thats okay. 

And then — after sharing — came something else…..
the vulnerability hangover.

That quiet voice whispering:
“Was I too much?”
“Too open?”
“Too different?”

Maybe you know that voice too. But here’s what I’m reminding myself today — and maybe it’s for you too:
I spoke from soul, not from script.
I didn’t perform, I offered.
I didn’t sell, I served.

And even if some don’t understand my way —
my way is still sacred.I’m not here to echo.
I’m here to embody.
To be a quiet rhythm in a noisy world.
To be a lighthouse — maybe not for the many, but for those who are truly looking.

So if my heart feels exposed right now,let it be.

That kind of honesty gives others permission to do the same.
To live from their hearts, too.That’s what the world needs right now.
The interview also reminded me of something important:
I can’t do something in a way that feels out of alignment with what’s been created.

Reading the interview back to myself, I realised something:
If I had read something like this years ago,
I would have felt hope.

Hope that organic growth is real.

That a what I offer doesn’t have to be perfect, shouted about or fit a strategy. That something scared should be honoured and offerred. 
And honestly,

I don’t know if people read these letters or Instagram posts and how they truly land.

But I do know they’re like throwing pebbles into a lake.

And this one — I pressed close to my heart before I threw it with intention. 

Maybe its ripple will reach you.
Maybe it will touch something in you that needed softening or remembering.Truth has a way of finding the ones who need it.Let this be a soft place to land —
for me, and maybe for you too. 

Thank you to CanvasRebel for the opportunity to reflect You can read the full interview by clicking here. 
with love and gratitude, Kamala

For more soul notes click here

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